AHHH! So, I finally did it. I posted a video cover of me singing Ed Sheeran’s Dive because Divide is freaking amazing.
If you guys have been following me for a while, you might know that I have posted a few covers ages ago on Soundcloud. They were just audio recordings that I did on my condenser mic that I bought because I needed it for school. Basically, I just wanted to test it out and I was a bit bored, but you guys seemed to really like it and the “covers” did get a lot of positive feedback.
If you’ve been following that, however, you’ll also know that I deleted all of my covers a while ago. Not deleted, per se, but I did set them all to private. Why, you ask?
Here’s the thing. I am very iffy about my voice. I don’t know how else to describe it, but basically, I can be very insecure and such a perfectionist when it comes to my singing voice. I hate hearing myself back because I can always find something that I want to change and I kind of hate the idea that other people are listening to me sing. Don’t get me wrong, I know I can sing, but for some reason I just hate listening to myself. I feel so weird and I get so frustrated whenever I see or hear something wrong, which is all the time, really. Ever since I posted those Soundcloud covers, people have been requesting for more and I could never do it because of my issues.
So, how did I get here then? It’s a combination of things. If you guys haven’t watched it yet, I did a cover with one of my bestest friends Kristel Fulgar on her channel of AJ Rafael’s She Was Mine. She’s been making covers for a while now and she asked me if I wanted to collaborate on a song and do a duet. Despite planning to for quite some time now, our collab didn’t push through until earlier this year (2017). I still had the same doubts as I’ve always had, but having someone close to me convince me and another voice to back mine up, it was a bit easier for me to do it. So, we set a date, worked on it, and it was really fun! That was where I kind of caught a glimpse on the process of making a cover. It’s a lot of work, but I really did enjoy it a lot and made me feel super accomplished at the end of the day.
So then, Kristel posted our video. Another great thing about this collab is that I’m not the one with the control of posting it and all that kind of stuff. Because I guarantee you, I would’ve chickened out and not even let it see the light of day. Yes, I have problems. But you guys already knew that.
The video was posted and we received a lot of positive feedback. That was another factor in me gaining the guts to post my own cover. You guys have been really great with encouraging me to post more and really, badgering me to do more covers. In a good way.
I also had great encouragement from loved ones and the people I’m working with right now. I’m the kind of person who really needs a push when it comes to these things, and I gladly welcome that. They really gave me the push I needed to just suck up my issues and take the leap.
Something that you might not know about me, as well, is that I really love YouTube. I love watching Youtubers probably more than I like watching TV. I started watching a few years back when I was going through a rough patch. Watching videos on Youtube by creators really cheered me up and put a smile on my face. My favorites are Zoella, DanIsNotOnFire, JacksGap, Tanya Burr, Tati, Sacconejolys, PewDiePie, Jenna Marbles, ThatcherJoe, GraveyardGirl, and many, many more. I watch everything from vlogs, beauty videos, skits, challenge videos, and even gaming videos. Ever since I started watching, I have also always wanted to create, but yeah, you know where this is going, I was too chicken. Going into 2017, I decided that I just really, really wanted to do it and I’m going to go for it. So yes, my newly created YouTube channel is not going to be just covers and music. I’ll also just be posting stuff that I want to post like beauty videos, challenges, reviews, all that kind of stuff.
If you’ll notice, this cover was recorded live. I didn’t pre-record it and we all did it in one take. Why is that? Well, I guess you could say that it’s part of me trying to get over my issues about my voice and singing. If I recorded the vocals, I would’ve easily done it over and over again until I was happy with it, which is basically never going to happen. I decided to do this song in one take, so I can basically force myself to be done with it. To deal with all the imperfections and just have it as it is. So no, this cover isn’t perfect, I want to change lots and lots of things, but it is what it is, because it was all one take and I can’t redo it over and over again. I literally am forcing myself to be okay with the imperfections.
Without further ado, here is the video of my cover of Ed Sheeran’s Dive in one take.
Okayyy, this was a long one. Just wanted to share some thoughts with you guys as I am trying out this new thing and going into a new chapter. I’ll probably, hopefully be doing this more as I start to post more videos on my channel. Just little blog posts to accompany videos, because yes, I will be talking a lot on those videos probably, but I do think I still articulate best when I write, and also, anything I miss out on in the video will be on here!
Let me know if you guys are excited for what’s to come! And leave me some comments and suggestions on what you would like to see in the future.